Nurture Your Childs Self-Esteem Essay Example for Free

Nurture Your Childs Self-Esteem Essay Kids start developing their sense of self as babies when they see themselves through their parents eyes. Your tone of voice, your body language, and your every expression are absorbed by your kids. Your words and actions as a parent affect their developing self-esteem more than anything else. Praising accomplishments, however small, will make them feel proud; letting kids do things independently will make them feel capable and strong. By contrast, belittling comments or comparing a child unfavorably with another will make kids feel worthless. Avoid making loaded statements or using words as weapons. Comments like What a stupid thing to do! or You act more like a baby than your little brother! cause damage just as physical blows do. Choose your words carefully and be compassionate. Let your kids know that everyone makes mistakes and that you still love them, even when you dont love their behavior. Catch Kids Being Good Have you ever stopped to think about how many times you react negatively to your kids in a given day? You may find yourself criticizing far more often than complimenting. How would you feel about a boss who treated you with that much negative guidance, even if it was well intentioned? The more effective approach is to catch kids doing something right: You made your bed without being asked — thats terrific! or I was watching you play with your sister and you were very patient. These statements will do more to encourage good behavior over the long run than repeated scoldings. Make a point of finding something to praise every day. Be generous with rewards — your love, hugs, and compliments can work wonders and are often reward enough. Soon you will find you are growing more of the behavior you would like to see. Set Limits and Be Consistent With Your Discipline Discipline is necessary in every household. The goal of discipline is to help kids choose acceptable behaviors and learn self-control. They may test the limits you establish for them, but they need those limits to grow into responsible adults. Establishing house rules helps kids understand your expectations and develop self-control. Some rules might include: no TV untilhomework is done, and no hitting, name-calling, or hurtful teasing allowed. You might want to have a system in place: one warning, followed by consequences such as a time out or loss of privileges. A common mistake parents make is failure to follow through with the consequences. You cant discipline kids for talking back one day and ignore it the next. Being consistent teaches what you expect. Make Time for Your Kids Its often difficult for parents and kids to get together for a family meal, let alone spend quality time together. But there is probably nothing kids would like more. Get up 10 minutes earlier in the morning so you can eat breakfast with your child or leave the dishes in the sink and take a walk after dinner. Kids who arent getting the attention they want from their parents often act out or misbehave because theyre sure to be noticed that way. Many parents find it rewarding to schedule together time with their kids. Create a special night each week to be together and let your kids help decide how to spend the time. Look for other ways to connect — put a note or something special in your kids lunchbox. Adolescents seem to need less undivided attention from their parents than younger kids. Because there are fewer windows of opportunity for parents and teens to get together, parents should do their best to be available when their teen does express a desire to talk or participate in family activities. Attending concerts, games, and other events with your teen communicates caring and lets you get to know more about your child and his or her friends in important ways. Dont feel guilty if youre a working parent. It is the many little things you do — making popcorn, playing cards, window shopping — that kids will remember. Be a Good Role Model Young kids learn a lot about how to act by watching their parents. The younger they are, the more cues they take from you. Before you lash out or blow your top in front of your child, think about this: is that how you want your child to behave when angry? Be aware that youre constantly being observed by your kids. Studies have shown that children who hit usually have a role model for aggression at home. Model the traits you wish to cultivate in your kids: respect, friendliness, honesty, kindness, tolerance. Exhibit unselfish behavior. Do things for other people without expecting a reward. Express thanks and offer compliments. Above all, treat your kids the way you expect other people to treat you. Make Communication a Priority You cant expect kids to do everything simply because you, as a parent, say so. They want and deserve explanations as much as adults do. If we dont take time to explain, kids will begin to wonder about our values and motives and whether they have any basis. Parents who reason with their kids allow them to understand and learn in a nonjudgmental way. Make your expectations clear. If there is a problem, describe it, express your feelings, and invite your child to work on a solution with you. Be sure to include consequences. Make suggestions and offer choices. Be open to your childs suggestions as well. Negotiate. Kids who participate in decisions are more motivated to carry them out. Be Flexible and Willing to Adjust Your Parenting Style If you frequently feel let down by your childs behavior, perhaps you have unrealistic expectations. Parents who think in shoulds (for example, My kid should be potty-trained by now) might find it helpful to read up on the matter or to talk to other parents or child development specialists. Kids environments have an impact on their behavior, so you may be able to modify that behavior by changing the environment. If you find yourself constantly saying no to your 2-year-old, look for ways to restructure your surroundings so that fewer things are off-limits. This will cause less frustration for both of you. As your child changes, youll gradually have to change your parenting style. Chances are, what works with your child now wont work as well in a year or two. Teens tend to look less to their parents and more to their peers for role models. But continue to provide guidance, encouragement, and appropriate discipline while allowing your teen to earn more independence. And seize every available moment to make a connection! Show That Your Love Is Unconditional As a parent, youre responsible for correcting and guiding your kids. But how you express your corrective guidance makes all the difference in how a child receives it. When you have to confront your child, avoid blaming, criticizing, or fault-finding, which undermine self-esteem and can lead to resentment. Instead, strive to nurture and encourage, even when disciplining your kids. Make sure they know that although you want and expect better next time, your love is there no matter what. Know Your Own Needs and Limitations as a Parent Face it — you are an imperfect parent. You have strengths and weaknesses as a family leader. Recognize your abilities — I am loving and dedicated. Vow to work on your weaknesses — I need to be more consistent with discipline. Try to have realistic expectations for yourself, your spouse, and your kids. You dont have to have all the answers — be forgiving of yourself. And try to make parenting a manageable job. Focus on the areas that need the most attention rather than trying to address everything all at once. Admit it when youre burned out. Take time out from parenting to do things that will make you happy as a person (or as a couple). Focusing on your needs does not make you selfish. It simply means you care about your own well-being, which is another important value to model for your children.

school hazing :: essays research papers

People are obsessed with the interrelation between different demeanors. Weather it be art and literature, matching shoes and shirts, or between men and women. We live in a society full of irreverent and dysfunctional relationships. In-fact, we were lucky enough to live during the time of The Break-up Heard 'Round the World, other wise known as when Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt broke up. The reason why the masses of literate minds are sucked into this timeless display of courtship is because they themselves have experienced similar relationships and knowing that they are not alone in the miserably bleak world of despair in the vain quest for love and acceptance. The many degrees of alliances, how strong they are, why they are being maintained, and what possible stresses can be applied to them by antagonists are all real world situations. People like to critique other people, and Hamlet is full of many archetype characters. Hamlet is based off of consanguinity, and the ext ream effe ct it has on people. People have aspirations and people want love. The relationships displayed in Hamlet revolve around personal lives clashing around ambitions. Ambitions driven by greed or revenge. "The serpent that did sting thy father's life/Now wears his crown." (Ghost 1,5) Hamlet talks to his fathers ghost and finds out that his uncle, his fathers own brother killed his father. From here on he is driven to get revenge for his fathers death. The rest of the play he puts on an antic disposition so he can get the information he wants and not have to explain why he is acting they way he is. If everyone thinks that Hamlet is crazy then they will not be suspicious. Hamlet is determined at all costs to kill Claudius from then on. "Does it not, think the, stand me now upon-/He that hath killed my king, and whored my mother,/...is't not perfect conscience/ To quit him with this arm?" (Hamlet 5,2) Hamlet is on the brink of killing Claudius and will soon have the chance. "Here, thou incestuous, murderous, damned Dane,/ Drink off this option. Is thy union here?/ Follow my mother." (Hamlet 5,2) This was said after his duel with Leartes, after he knew he was going to die. He makes Claudius drink from the poisoned cup his mother drank from. One of the last things he does is ensure that his vengeance is complete.

Child sexual abuse victims Essay

I. STATEMENT OF THE PROBLEM Sexual abuse of children is a harsh fact of life in our society. Child sexual abuse is a form of child abuse in which an adult or older adolescents uses a child for sexual stimulation. Forms of child sexual abuse includes asking or pressuring a child to engage in sexual activates, regardless of the outcome, indecent exposure to a child with intent to gratify their own sexual desire or to intimidate or groom the child, physically sexual contact with child or using a child to produce child pornography. A child abuse victim can result in both short – term and long-term harm physically and emotionally. What would you do if you knew a child who became a victim? That’s a question everyone should be ready to answer if they want to protect our future generations. A. DEFINITIONS There is no universal definition for CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE VICTIM(S). However, a major characteristic of any abuse is the dominant position of an adult that allows him or her to force or coerce a child into sexual activity. Child sexual abuse may include fondling a child’s genitals, masturbation, oral-genital contact, digital penetration, and vaginal and anal intercourse. (â€Å"American psychological association,† 2011) Other forms of abuse can also occur that are not as easy to detect. These include showing adults’ genitals to a child, showing the child pornographic or â€Å"dirty† pictures or videotapes, or using the child as a model to make pornographic materials. (â€Å"Child advocacy resources†) A victim of child abuse suffers from PSYCHOLOGICAL EFFECTS that have an immediate emotion. These effects of abuse cause isolation, fear and an inability to trust. This can translate into lifelong consequences, including low self-esteem, depression, and relationship difficulties. Researchers have identified links between child abuse and poor mental and emotional health, Cognitive difficulties, and Social difficulties. In one long-term study, 80 percent of young adults who were abused met the diagnostic criteria for at least one psychiatric disorder by age 21. Some problems include depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and suicide attempts. Other psychological and emotional effects include panic attacks, attention-deficit/ hyperactive disorder, depression, anger, and posttraumatic stress. (Child Welfare Information Gateway, 2008) PHYSICAL EFFECTS are defined, as immediate physical abuse can be relatively minor, such as bruises or cuts. It can also be very severe such as broken bones, hemorrhage, or even death. Physical effects in some cases can be temporary, however the pain and suffering they cause a child should not be discounted. Several studies have shown adults who experience abuse or neglect during childhood is more likely to suffer from physical ailments such as allergies, arthritis, asthma, bronchitis, and high blood pressure. (Child Welfare Information Gateway, 2008) B. STATISTICS 1. VULNERABILITY In over 90 percent of child sexual abuses causes, the offender is known and trusted by the victim. â€Å"Grooming† is the process used by the offend ender to recruiter and prepare a child for sexual victimization. It starts when the offender targets a specific child. While all children are at risk for victimization, certain factors make some children more vulnerable to sexual abuse than others. For example, a child is especially susceptible if he or she feels unloved, has low self-esteem, has little contact with committed adults or regularly spends time unsupervised. Sex offenders commonalty  engage children by spending time with them, playing games with them, and showing them special attention or giving them gifts. Older children or teens may be offered drugs or alcohol. Offenders forge an emotional bond through frequent contact, positive interaction and by conveying the child or teen that they â€Å"understand† or can appreciate their interests and concerns. In time the emotional bond leads to non-sexual physical contact which can take the form of physical play such as wrestling, affection, touching etc. In this way the offender tests the child’s boundaries, gradually turning into sexual touch. Usually if the child is older the child starts to become uncomfortable or fearful of the sexual activity. Offenders typically threat the child to keep them from speaking up. Most child victims are caught in a web of fear, guilt and confusion as a result of the sex offender’s grooming and manipulation. Sadly, many child victims remain silent about their abuse. (Bisquera) 2. INDICATORS OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE Indicators of child sexual abuse are varied and should always be considered in the context of what else is happening in a child’s life. Any one indicator, on its own, is a sign that something may be impacting a child’s well being. Some behavior indicators can be unexplained change in a child’s comfort level (either attachment or fear) around any person in a position of trust. They could show abrupt changes in performance in school or home. A significant difference in the way the child socializes. For younger children, a sudden loss of skills could be a red flag. A child who was toilet trained could start wetting the bed. Abuse can an also include sexual behavior, often in front of others, such as self-exposure, masturbation, touching others peoples private parts, sexual language. In older children or teens this might be seen as promiscuous behavior. Physical indicators such as bruises, scratches, irritation/ itching around genitals that are not consistent with explanations of how they happened. A victim who is not sexually active could show signs of sexual transmitted diseases, such as crabs, herpes, and gonorrhea. They could also experience tenderness or soreness around areas of penetration. Finding blood in their stool or urine should also cause some concern when it is not explained by other conditions. Underwear is often where proof of abuse may exist. (Bisquera) C. EXPERT STATEMENTS 1. FREQUENCY OF OCCURRENCE Overall cases of child sexual abuse fell more than 60 percent from 1992 to 2010, according to David Finkelhor, a leading expert on sexual abuse. The evidence for this decline comes from a variety of indicators. It includes national surveys of child abuse and crime victimization. The crime statistics are compiled by the F.B.I analysis of data from the National Data Archive On Child Abuse and Neglect and annual surveys of school students in Minnesota. All of the data pointed in the same direction. From 1990 to 2010 cases of sexual abuse dropped from 23 per 10,000 children to 8.6 per 10,000 children. All of the subjects were under the age of 18. Researches found a 62 percent decrease. There was a 3 percent drop from 2009 to 2010. The Minnesota Student Survey also reported a 29 percent decline in reports of sexual abuse by an adult who was not a family member from1992 to 2010. They also saw a 28 percent drop in reports of sexual abuse by a family member. At the same time, the willingness of children to report sexual abuses has increased. They found that in 50 percent of sexual abuse cases, the child’s victimization had been reported to an authority, compared with 25 percent in 1992. (Goode, 2012) 2. COMMON MOTIVES OF OFFENDERS Studies on who commits child sexual abuse vary in their findings, but the most common finding is that the majority of sexual offenders are family members or is otherwise known to the child. Sexual abuse by strangers is not nearly as common as sexual abuse by a family member. Reasearch further shows that men perpetrate most instances of sexual abuse, but there are cases that women are the offenders. Despite a common myth, Homosexual men are not more likely to sexually abuse children than heterosexual men. (â€Å"American psychological association,† 2011) About 73% of child sexual abusers report experiencing sexual abuse in their own childhood. Not all pedophiles are child molesters. Pedophilia is a clinical term that describes a person who has had repeated arousing fantasies, sexual urges, or behaviors related to sexual activities with children for at least six months. Pedophiles do not  necessarily have to act on their urges. Sexual offenders have the same attraction to children, but they act on their urges. Sexual offenders come from all backgrounds and social classes. They do their best to become friends with parents, and then they work to gain the child’s trust. (â€Å"†64 facts of†¦Ã¢â‚¬  2012) II. REVIEW OF THE LITERATURE A. HISTORY 1. THE RISE OF PUBLIC CONCERN Public concern about child abuse has steadily increased. The number of referrals to child protection services in recent years has risen every year since the 1960s. It is not clear if the increase of reporting is due to a higher incident of abuse or a widening of the definition of abuse. (Eileen, 2008) Sexual abuse of children was not taken seriously until 1964 when congress passed the Child Abuse and Prevent and Treatment Act. This established reporting requirements of suspected cases. Among some experts there was a tendency to deny that sexual abuse had lasting consequences. Researchers have now found that there are long-term emotional problems that surface. (Mintz,2012) A contributing factor to the growing public concern is also widely publicized deaths. Although the field of child protection services date back to the nineteenth century, public concern has rarely reached the present level of intensity. (Polsky, 1991) 2. CIVIL LAWSUITS Child abuse statues have been enacted in most states to provide civil immunity for those making good faith reports of suspected child abuse. Most states also provide immunity from criminal liability. Physicians, nurses and social workers are required to report suspected child abuse that comes before them in some states failure to report a case carries criminal penalties as well as civil liability. B. KEY ISSUES 1. WHAT ARE THE EFFECTS OF CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE? There are short term and long-term impacts of sexual child abuse. Depression, anxiety, amnesia, disengagement and numbing are just a few have the psychological and emotional responses victims’ experience. As children become adults they can suffer intimacy disturbance, making it hard for them to physically and emotionally have a healthy relationship. Suicidal thoughts and co-dependence are also long-term impacts of sexual abuse. WHAT TO DO IF YOU THINK A CHILD YOU KNOW HAS BEEN THE VICTIM OF CHILD ABUSE Speak up but choose the time and place carefully. Do not ask the child about his or her abuse in front of the person you think may be abusing the child. Ask them questions. Find out if anyone has been making them feel uncomfortable. They many not know they are being abused themselves or know its wrong. Follow up on whatever made you concerned. Ask in a non-judgmental way – using the word â€Å"I† rather than â€Å"you† so they don’t feel shamed. Building a trusting relationship with the child is also important. They should know how to say â€Å"no† and when something does make them feel uncomfortable, they should tell a trusted adult. Most importantly, children should know that some parts of their body are private. (RAINN, 2009) PROVING SEXUAL ABUSE Many child abuse cases must be proved using circumstantial evidence because direct evidence is not available. In many instances, the child is unable to tell what happened, and the offender does not ordinarily disclose the truth. Inferences are therefore very important in providing child abuse. Some sexual abuse requires proof of forcible compulsion. When the victim is a child, the child abuses often submits to the advances of adults who have parental or similar authorities over the child. (Tomas J., 2010) C. MOST RECENT RESEARCH 1. UNDERREPORTED AND LIGHTLY PROSECUTED Child abuse is greatly underreported and under estimated mostly because of the lack of an agreed- upon definition of abuse. Underreporting is related to several factors. Children over the age of 5 often care for or know their abuser. Therefore, they find themselves trapped between the need for affection and a sense that something is wrong. Cases of sexual child abuse are often lightly prosecuted because of minimal communication between  the prosecutors office and child protected services. 2. POSSIBLE COMPLICATIONS Some children overcome the physical and physiological effects of child abuse. Those with strong social support can adapt and cope with bad experiences. For many others, however, child abuse has lifelong consequences, For example, child abuse may result in physical, behavioral, emotion and mental issues. Some physical issues include disabilities and health problems. Abuse of others or frequent, causal sex with many different partners (sexual promiscuity) or teen pregnancy is an example of behavioral issues. Emotional issues can include low self-esteem, difficulty establishing or maintaining relationship, challenges with intimacy and trust. (Mayo Clinic, 2010) D. INFORMATION FOR THE EXPERTS 1. RESEARCH REGARDING PREVENTION STRATEGIES FROM EXPERTS Experts suggest correcting the imbalance between adult and children by empowering children. First off information is power. Children who know their own bodies are more likely to choose when, how, and by whom they are touched. Self esteem building and experts also suggest self-defense skills. Lastly children need resources. They should have a network of trusted adults they can turn to. (Torbin,2002) 2. PROTECTING CHILDREN FROM SEXUAL ABUSE The first step in protecting children from sexual abuse is recognizing telltale symptoms. Changes in attitude and rebellion at school could point to an underling problem. It is important to educated children about their body parts by understanding what is private. Adults need to be aware of their child’s surrounding at school or in a childcare setting. Parents should educate themselves on ‘red flags’ to protect their child from sexual abuse. III. SUMMARY A. DISCUSSION OF FINDINGS 1. ABOUT RESEARCH Despite our prevention effort, much more must be done to decrease the incidents of child abuse and neglect. Our efforts should be directed to changes in the helping system, changes in society, and additional research. One of the hopes for the future lies in research, not only to further define and understand abuse but also to evaluate existing programs. Only though out commitment to change and our willingness to research what will create a better future will we combat the growing problem of sexual child abuse. 2. ABOUT PROGRAMS With child protection agencies are responsible for direct intervention form investigation and case management. These agencies can be hampered if there is not communicatory and public support for their work, which includes offering programs to help prevent child sexual abuse. There needs to be more extensive community awareness and education to reduce harm. B. SOCIETY’S CONCERN WITH CRIME Society is helping the system make changes in order to reduce the rate of child abuse. Research is needed to further define and understand abuse. Evaluation is also needed for the existing programs. Commitment to change and willingness to research will create a better future to combat the growing problem of sexual child abuse. IV. CONCLUSION A. THE PROBLEM REVISITED WITH OPINIONS Child abuse is always been a problem, and in recent year it has made its way to the spotlight. Many people are willing to talk about them being a victim as a child. The more people feel comfortable talking about child sexual abuse. The less it will become a crime. Children become victims because of their vulnerability of trusting adults and unaware of the wrong. If you think a child you know has been a victim of child sexual abuse thing you can do is to give the child a safe environment in which to talk to you or another trusted adult. Encourage the child to talk about what he or she has  experienced, but be careful not to suggest events to him or her that may not of happened. Reassure the child that they did not do anything wrong. Seek mental assistance for the child. Being aware that many states laws require that persons who know or have a reason to suspect that a child has been sexual abuses must report that abuse to either a local law informant officials or child protection officials. Our future generation needs to feel protected from being a victim of child sexual abuse. B. SUGGESTION OF POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS. 1. PROGRAMS The best way to prevent child abuse is educate parents about child abuse. Most parents feel that this could never happen to them. When it happens the parents are in shock, but when they learn some warning signs, they are able to point them out. There are many free programs that can teach parents how to educate their children on protecting themselves from child abuse. The reality is when there are budget cuts; these programs that protect our future generations are the first to get cut. 2. POLICY Having Policy’s in school districts and childcare environments can be the solution to protecting children. One suggestion would be to have restrictions on when and where is acceptable for a child to alone with adult. This policy does not only protect the child, but it protects the adult from false accusations. 3. LAWS Laws against child sexual abuse can very by country. Based on the local definition of who is a child and what constitutes sexual abuse. As the age of the consent to sexual behaviors varies from country to country, so do definitions of child sexual abuse. An adult’s sexual intercourse with a minor below the legal age of consent may sometimes be referred to statutory rape based on the principle that any apparent consent by a minor could not be considered legal consent. References _American psychological association_. (2011). Retrieved February 20, 2013, from http://www.apa.org/pubs/info/brochures/sex-abuse.aspx A.D.A.M. (2012). _New york times_. Retrieved February 20, 2013, from http://health.nytimes.com/health/guides/disease/child-abuse-sexual/overview.html Bisquera, A. _Child sexual abuse_. Retrieved February 20, 2013, from http://satchawaii.com/get-info-about- child-sexual-abuse.aspx _Child advocacy resource and consultation center_. (n.d.). Retrieved February 20, 2013, from http://www.nyscarcc.org/abuse/abuse.php Child Welfare Information Gateway. (2008). _Factsheets_. Retrieved February 20, 2013, from https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/factsheets/long_term_consequences.cf Eileen , M. (2008). (2nd ed.). Thousand Oaks, California: SAGE Publications. Retrieved April 1, 2013 from http://books.google.com/books?id=0nkvffIwK5YC&pg=PA80&dq=rise of public concern child abuse&hl=en&sa=X&ei=n4tQUdO1OqHQiwKnqICQCw&ved=0CFMQ6AEwBg Goode, E. (2012, June 28). Researchers see decline in child sexual abuse rate. Retrieved February 20, 2013, from http://www.nytimes.com/2012/06/29/us/rate- of-child-sexual- abuse-on-the-decline.html?_r=0 Mayo Clinic. (2010, July 1). _Child abuse: Complications_. Retrieved April 1, 2013 from http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/child-abuse/DS01099/DSECTION=complications Mintz, S. (2012, July 13). Placing childhood sexual abuse in historical perspective. Retrieved April 1, 2013 from http://blogs.ssrc.org/tif/2012/07/13/placing-childhood-sexual-abuse-i n-historical-perspective/ Polsky, A. (1991). _The rise of the therapeutic state_. (1st ed.). Princeton, New Jersey: Princeton University Press. Retrieved April 1, 2013 from http://books.google.com/books?id=fngqbWhPLmsC&pg=PA202&dq=rise of public concern child abuse&hl=en&sa=X&ei=n4tQUdO1OqHQiwKnqICQCw&ved=0CF4Q6AEwCA RAINN. (2009). _Child sexual abuse_. Retrieved April 1, 2013 from http://www.rainn.org/get- information/types-of-sexual-assault/child-sexual-abuse/if-you-suspect Sue , A. M. (1996). _The reality of abuse_. Retrieved February 20, 2013, from http://www.yesican.org/stats.html Tomas J., G. (2010). _Criminal evidence: Principles and cases_. (7th ed.). Belmont, CA: Wadsworth. Retrieved April 1, 2013 from http://books.google.com/books?id=AlBYw53p9f4C&pg=PA81&dq=proving sexual abuse&hl=en&sa=X&ei=G6ZQUaqVF8LJigKV_IDICg&ved=0CEMQ6AEwAw (2012). â€Å"64 facts of.. child sexual abuse. Retrieved February 20, 2013, from http://facts.randomhistory.com/child-sexual-abuse-facts.html

Case Study Motor Vehicle Pollution - 2028 Words

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